Curvy Girls Can’t

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I FINALLY worked up the confidence to wear my favorite skirt again, and by finally I mean like 2 years later. I paired my skirt with a denim top and some cute booties; I felt so fierce in my striped body con skirt- nothing could stop me. Well…except one thing…a blog or website dedicated to bashing the “plus sized” community. (Sadly there are an abundance of these)

I was sitting a few tables over from these women who were laughing at “things plus sized women shouldn’t wear.” They were reading off this list of things bigger women shouldn’t wear. “Well duh of course they can’t wear that.” Why. Why is this a thing? (Yes I know eavesdropping isn’t okay, but they were super loud!) Guess what two things were on there? Body con skirts and stripes. The two things I just happened to be wearing. I started rethinking my bold decision, but ya know what? Fuck them.

If you feel like a goddess in whatever you’re wearing, keep rocking that outfit. Live in it. You wanna wear that sheer top? Go for it. How about that crop top? WHAT. You want to wear some patterns?? Why the L not? You want to show off some skin? How about some curves? I dare you. Do it. Don’t stop wearing things because someone else wants you to. Let’s turn “curvy can’t” to “curvy fuckin’ will.”

 

I’m Losin’ it.

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Let me tell you…this year has been such a shit show. After finally ending an abusive relationship, I dropped out of school and laid in bed for two months. Two months I laid there listening to the monsters in my head try to convince me that I’m better off dead. My family doesn’t understand depression, so they left me alone to do my thing. Which was a good and bad idea. I had many thoughts and strategies as to how I could possibly end my life that I thought was going no where.

The first few weeks I just laid there. My Dad made fun of me for “being lazy” because he doesn’t believe depression is a real thing and refuses to acknowledge that there is something wrong with his daughter. I made an effort to watch TV with the family so he would leave me alone. We watched the show “My 600 Pound Life” and holy shit was that a game changer. This man named Joe struggled with his weight and depression when one day he had a wake up call that would change his life. “I’m not going to let them bury me,” is my favorite quote of his. He started changing his lifestyle; he exercised, ate way healthier than ever, received the okay to have a gastric bypass surgery, started dating this girl (from Iowa yay!!), and now he’s married. This man has lost over 400 pounds and is now my inspiration. I wanted to be like Joe; I wanted to be successful.

The following day something just clicked, changed. I put on my favorite workout leggings, tennis shoes, headband, and walked out the front door. I walked the countryside for about 5 miles and plopped down in someone’s field. I stared in awe at the natural landscape and the farms- it was all just so beautiful to me. I sat there for a few hours- I even found myself smiling. I loved the feeling of being so free by simply walking and staring at the sky, so I made this an every day activity. I still came home and laid in bed for the rest of the day, but it was definitely a start. When I started my summer job I walked a few miles everyday and started to eat healthier. It’s now September and since the beginning of the summer I’ve lost 40 pounds and I couldn’t be happier. Thank you Joe for being an incredible human and inspiration.

 

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Big Booty Epiphany

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Growing up in a suburb (lacking any kind of diversity) outside of Des Moines, everyone was expected to be prim, proper, and…well perfect. At least that’s how it was in my neighborhood. The people I lived by never failed to flaunt their perfect lives.

All of the girls around my age had perfect, skinny bodies-and they knew it. They would all come over to my house to swim, and when it came time to expose myself in my swimsuit, the girls just sat there and stared. “Why is your butt so big?” From that moment on it was like my ass was everyone’s business.

The comments followed me into middle school, but the comments turned into teasing and soon bullying which totally ruined my self esteem. Girls would always whisper behind my back about how GINORMOUS my ass was. I always thought that was a bad thing and hated my body completely.

Then the glorious years of high school finally came and the big booty teasing finally stopped. Why? Because something amazing happened. Some girls would come up to me and say that they wished they had an ass like mine. Say whattt???

This plus size, thick, curvy revolution sparked around the world. Women everywhere started embracing their big butts, arms, legs, stomachs and hearts; girls my age were jealous of these women! To have that kind of self confidence is incredible.

THEN I HAD AN EPIPHANY.

There will always be those women who are obsessed with being skinny and judge those who aren’t a size negative 5, but WHO CARES WHAT THEY THINK?? Models for every freaking company have it ingrained in our minds that you HAVE to look like this and you HAVE to have this body.

BUT NEWS FLASH: No one is THAT perfect! And if they are, they have flaws just like the rest of us.

While these big beautiful women were publicly showing off their curves, they showed me that I should love who I am and flaunt what I’ve got! It’s okay to be different! It’s okay to be thick and have a real body with beautiful curves!

I have been so caught up in trying to squeeze into the skinny comformity that I forgot to stop and be thankful for the beautiful body I have.